Tag: gay couples

Love In The Records (Part II: David & I)

written by: Nevada Bird

Love finds you in unexpected places and at unexpected times. For me, it found me surrounded by old vinyl records from the neighborhood record store.

David, with his kind eyes and a smile that could melt glaciers, was everything I wasn’t—older, wiser, and possessing a calmness that drew me in like a moth to a flame.

Our love story unfolded over countless cups of coffee and shared vinyl finds. We navigated the age gap with laughter and understanding. But as time, like a skipping record, began to repeat itself, David’s health declined.

Suddenly, I found myself transitioning from lover to caregiver. Doctor appointments and medication schedules replaced the carefree days of record shopping.

It was during this time that I realized the importance of having a centralized record of David’s medical history.

A personal health record keeper saved us.

It wasn’t just a book; it was a symbol of our love.

We kept all his medical information in one place: allergies, medications, and past procedures. In this way, we could always locate the necessary paperwork quickly and efficiently during emergencies.

It wasn’t always sunshine and roses. Caregiving is a marathon, not a sprint.

But looking back, the moments of quiet intimacy eclipsed the challenges—shared breakfasts, stolen kisses, and reminiscing about our love story soundtracks’d by the crackle of old vinyl.

David is gone now, but his memory and the love we shared live on. And so does the invaluable health record keeper who helped us navigate his care.

It’s a reminder that love isn’t always grand gestures; sometimes, it’s the little things, like keeping a well-organized health record, that speak volumes.

In a world filled with uncertainties, a personal health record keeper can be a source of comfort and peace of mind. It’s a promise you make to yourself and your loved ones—a promise of care, of preparedness, and of love made tangible.

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Love In The Records (Part IV/Finale: Kevin & Benedict)

written by: Nevada Bird

I still vividly recall the first time I laid eyes on him, the man who would transform my life in ways I never imagined. 

It was an ordinary day at the restaurant where I worked as a server, and he was a familiar face, a loyal customer who came in at the same hour every day, regardless of the weather.

Then one day, he surprised me by leaving a note on the back of the check. I acted startled, nearly dropping my tray in surprise. 

Along with his usual generous tip, there was a phone number scrawled on the back of the receipt. I carefully folded the check and tucked it into my apron, feeling a warm sense of excitement as I left work that day.

I could hardly wait to get home, wrestling with the decision of whether or not to call him. After a couple of hours, I finally mustered the courage and dialed the number from the note. 

That evening turned out to be absolutely incredible, etching itself into my memory as one of the most unforgettable nights of my life.

As I stepped into the hotel resort, I was greeted by an exquisite display of lights that left me in awe. Our first dinner was at the five-star restaurant overlooking the ocean, and he even arranged for a hotel room. 

Everything with him unfolded at lightning speed: a dinner date, a stroll along the sandy beach under the stars, and our first night together in a hotel room; it felt like a beautiful dream I never wanted to wake up from.

Just a week later, after our enchanting time together, he proposed that I move in with him. Without hesitation, I agreed. Ever since, I’ve been by his side, and we’ve built a joyful life together. 

However, our 35-year age gap has lingered in my mind, making me anxious about what life might be like without him.

I want to ensure he remains healthy and vibrant for as long as possible, which is why I decided to delve into caregiving and begin training in that area.

As I was browsing, I decided to shop for a caregiver guide through the Amazon app on my tablet when I stumbled upon a book that caught my attention: a ‘‘My Health Record’.’ I grabbed a copy right away. 

A couple of days later, I found this book not only allows me to document the health history of my partner’s family members, but it also provides space for information about doctors, specialists, and appointments for vision and dental care. 

I’ve noted visits to various clinics, scheduled appointments with an ear specialist, and the process of obtaining a hearing aid. 

Flipping through the pages brings back memories—recording the days he had to go to the emergency room, recounting hospital visits, detailing medications and supplements, and keeping track of any side effects. 

Each entry feels like a chapter in a memoir of our love as I prepare for the final phase of his life. Although he’s gone now, I remember fondly his words just before his last hospital admission: “You are my china in the whole world!” 

He would often say that when he was lucid, expressing how well I cared for him and the deep love he felt for me. I take pride in knowing that we had always looked after one another throughout our lives.

Watching him slowly fade away shattered my heart. On his last day in the hospital, a compassionate nurse suggested I go home and rest, so I did.

First thing I did when I arrived home. I went straight to my bathroom. 

During the shower, the weight that had been pressing down in my heart suddenly lifted, and tears began to flow uncontrollably. I curled up under the cascading water, sobbing and gasping for breath as the grief poured out of me. 

Three hours later, the hospital called for me to return. When I arrived, I found the love of my life lying peacefully on the hospital bed. I stood there in silence, my mind going blank as if the entire world had crumbled around me. 

I gathered his belongings and placed a tender kiss on his forehead before leaving. I didn’t linger; returning home through the pouring rain, I finally let the tears come. 

I drove in anguish, shouting and crying—the most excruciating night of my life. I felt restless and unable to find solace as I struggled with my grief… 

The next day, a kind neighbor offered her condolences, and as I shared my pain, I confessed that I hadn’t been there for him when he was dying.

In response, she offered a comforting thought: “Perhaps he was holding on, waiting for you to let go of your sadness. Now he can truly be at peace.”

A year later, I woke one night, still holding the ‘My Health Record’ I had fallen asleep with. I wondered if it was finally time to let go.

I lit the fireplace and tossed the record into the flames, watching as it transformed into ashes. 

Standing up, I resolved to move forward into the unknown. I would continue on until I discovered a new reason to live and a path to happiness once more.

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